i am too tired of my life

this is my 4th attempt of ca inter g1 since nov23 i am too tired

people my age are living life and i am here not moving forward.... it is my dream to become a CA but bhai pass hi nehi hori yaar kal dt ka paper hai and am crying like anything on festival thinking how bad my life has turned and i cant even look myself in mirror

i am so jealous of people my age all my frinds are engineers jinse baat karre pata nehi kitne time hohgaya all are doings jobs and i am here i was state topper in 12th but life has taken such a u turn now i am just in my room studyng eating sleeping this is going since 2023

kaise log ek bar mein hi clear karlete hai yaar i really want to be a CA i enjoy the subjects and all but dont know where i am lacking i am soo scared ki mein kahi piche nehi rehjao in life my younger self imagined 22yrs old herself as a confident women doing what she loves but reality turned out soo different i am very scared of my future this is so heartbreaking yaar i just cant stop crying while writing this

ok bye just came here for ranting