Any counters ?

I find it so frustrating that anytime I talk about men’s issues there is someone that brings up the patriarchy. Since men have so much “power” it hurts them in the long run. Men having to dominate women even tho society hates us ? Lol They never bring up that we go to jail longer. Die much more at work. Are more likely to be homeless. More likely to lose custody battles etc. I don’t feel I have enough solid information about patriarchy to know. Can anyone point me in a solid direction of a book or anything to dismantle some of these ideas ? Thank you